My high school crush once identified me years after graduation–from behind and across a gym parking lot, no less–by the sight of my legs.� He said to the person who later informed me of the near miss, “I would recognize those ghost-white legs anywhere.”
Not a compliment.
I’m pale.� Really, really pale.� My arms, hands, neck, and face aren’t ghostly, of course, because they are regularly exposed to sun just by driving around and living in an area of almost constant sunshine.� Still, as a rule, I always buy the second lightest foundation color available.� I don’t care for my legs (at all) so I rarely wear shorts.� Consequently, my legs reflect, almost literally, how pale I actually am.� If my legs ever appear tan, it’s the self tanner.
My hair, on the other hand, is a very dark brown.� My eyebrows are the color of pitch.� Between the pale skin and dark hair, I can look a bit anemic, especially in the winter.� A couple of months ago someone I didn’t know approached me only to tell me that I reminded them of Snow White.� “Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that you look ill or anything,” they said.� “It’s just, well, you’re really pale and your hair…isn’t.”
Oh, good!� As long I don’t look ill.
Fast forward to today.� In the pictures I took for The BSP guest post, my hair looked much lighter than it is in real life.� I thought it looked cute, that maybe I could pull off light hair after all.� I suggested to my hair stylist that I might like to try going a bit lighter.� She went bananas at the thought of me not looking like Morticia Adams and before I could say slow down with the foils, you’re scaring me, I had hair the color of a caramel apple.� How do I put this delicately?
I DON’T LOVE IT!!
My skin is neutral, maybe a touch olive, with a lot of red in the cheeks.� All this gold in my hair makes me look like tarnished silver.� Hey, maybe I should dip my head in a plastic bowl filled with warm water, tin foil, and salt and make it all better!
Sigh.
What’s worse, my stylist doesn’t love it, either.� In fact, she immediately suggested we go back and darken them up.� (There’s a sign you look like crap!)� I didn’t have time for that, so I told her I would come back next week with a lump of coal for a color match.
In the meantime, my friends and family were in a furor today trying to catch a glimpse of Snow White with her hair did.� I obliged them by taking a picture, but when I saw myself with this hair and without makeup…I almost cried–except I’m not a crier so mainly I fumed.� Then I ran into the bathroom and took a quick five minutes to put on some makeup.� That exercise in subterfuge reminded me that I promised Melissa in the comments of this post that I would share my 5 minute makeup routine.
A 502 word preface to a 5 minute makeup routine?� How else was I going to explain why my skin looks like salmon and my eyelids have been replaced with tangerine wedges?� (No, I’m not wearing eyeshadow.� That’s just what happens when your hair color is patently wrong for your complexion.)
Since I am 37, my goal is to look like I have younger, dewy skin.� You can’t do this wearing powdered anything.� Stay away from the powders if you have dry skin, older skin, or large pores.� Trust.� Here is my over-35, dry skin, 5 minute beauty routine.� It gets slightly more complicated when I am going out or planning on taking pictures of myself.�
(I linked everything to my Amazon store because it was easier for me to stay on one site.� Please don’t think I linked to the lowest priced retailer if you are willing to shop online.� Ease was my motivation here!)
- Moisturize.� I have dry skin, so I often use night cream during the day.� I like this one, but I rarely exhibit brand loyalty.� If I use something I can’t live without, I’ll tell you.
- Primer.� Reduce pores, mask fine lines, and even skin tone.� I like this one, as you already know.
- Tinted Moisturizer.� This is actually a really good one.� Most tinted moisturizers don’t offer much coverage, but this one provides just enough to do the job while still looking natural.� Tristan recommended this one to me, and I love it.
- Cheek Stain.� Another great recommendation by Tristan, and I usually buy what she recommends simply because she has yet to fail me.� I hadn’t much luck with stains until this one.� It’s solid, like a sheer lipstick.� Don’t be alarmed by the color (FLUSH, which looks magenta), and don’t buy taupe blush.� No one blushes beige in real life.� That said, I’m a bit on the cool side–if you are warmer than me, go with something “nuclear” as Tristan likes to say, but keep it warm, like a coral.
- Mascara.� My eyes are my best feature (my opinion) and I am lucky enough to have nice lashes, too.� So, for me, mascara is an obsession.� I have yet to find one that I like as much as the now discontinued Avon version from the 90s, but I remain steadfast in my hunt.� I really like this one, but I have a real problem with it smudging.� No one else I know seems to have this problem, so maybe it’s just me.� [I would verify that Amazon pricing–I paid double that amount at Sephora for the same mascara.]
- Lip Gloss(ish).� I just don’t think there are many women over 35 who can pull off heavily glossed lips.� It looks weird, like you’ve been walking around Disneyland sucking on a giant turkey leg.� I’m still searching for the perfect lip balm, one that gives you nice color with a subtle gloss.� In the meantime, I am very happy with this gloss.� It has a metal ball applicator and I keep it in the ash tray of my car.� There is no color to it.� It’s glossy only at first, and minimally at that.� It basically gives your lips a bit of moisture and gets rid of the ashy look we all tend to get when we aren’t wearing color.� It’s what I am wearing in the picture above, and you can see how washed out my lips look with my new hair color.� Sigh.
- Eyebrow Filler.� I have an extensive scar in my right eyebrow.� The scar runs horizontally through the brow, splitting it in half.� This is a great pencil to fill in your brows if they are sparse or on the off-chance you have a scar as noticeable as mine.� Unlike most pencils, the color is quite sheer, like an eye shadow.� This means I only have to fill in the scarred portion of my brows.� With other pencils, the application is so thick that I have to fill the entire brow so that everything blends and more often than not the look is too heavy and dark.� Does that make sense?� Anyway, this is one of those items I don’t fiddle faddle with.� I only use this pencil, and I use it as an eyeliner, too, to make my lashes look thicker.
- Eyebrow Gel.� This is another item I have used for years and I will not deviate from this brand.� Because of my scar, I will often allow the hair on my right eyebrow to grow long enough to somewhat cover the scar.� It’s impossible to cover it fully, but on those days where I don’t feel like wearing any makeup I use this to keep the hair in place.� I don’t want you to think that my eye is disfigured or that I look like Cousin It with long sweeping eyebrow hair…maybe I should show you what I mean.
ANYWAY.� That’s it, Melissa.� Five minutes.� You don’t even need to do steps 7 and 8 if your eyebrows have a nice shape…or you just don’t care which, as a female attorney, could very well be the case. ;-) [Kidding!� Sort of!]
As for my friends and family and what they think of my hair?� I think my friend Steve’s reply email to my request for an opinion sums up the consensus nicely.� He wrote, “I cannot say I do or do not based on the picture.”� I imagine he typed this insightful proclamation after having lost his lunch in the wastebasket beneath his desk.
That’s not bad hair. Bad hair is when your 5 year old gasps and then squeaks out “I want your old hair back, Mommy.” I think you are prettier with your natural dark color. This isn’t bad, but it makes your eyebrows look sort of fake, because they look so perfect. Um, that is actually a twisted compliment!
I have the palest legs on the market…and calves that won’t fit into a lot of regular tall boots. Big white logs from hell. Guys used to say “you play soccer, huh?” and I wanted to punch them…bc I never played soccer and those babies were inherited (although my 3 other sisters only got 10% versions of what I got.) I love the combination of dark hair with pale skin. So pretty. And I don’t think your hair looks bad. I am the opposite…I hate when my roots grow out…I feel so…blah.
Cute yellow, top? Dress?
Sweetheart, you just need better role models. I love Snow White’s look, and Cher- I wanted to BE Cher. Dita Von Tease, so pretty. All I’m saying is the grass is always greener, no? I LOVE your dark hair and light complextion.
I wrongly thought once I could go lighter. I was a toe head as a baby and it slowly got darker. I like my dirty blonde, but I wanted a change. It was a total no and washed me out something awful. I didn’t care if my hair fell out, I redyed it the same day.
O.k., 5 minutes..
1. Oil of olay sensitive formula w/sunscreen
2. Rimmel liquid mineral foundaion (just as great as the expensive brands)
3. E.L.F. cosmetics mineral powder for overall color/blush/eyeshadow
Won this on the Brightside project and fell in love with them!
4. Maybelline black mascara
5. Lipstick or tint de jour
: )
I can’t believe you have pasty white legs–your olive complexion must win out in photos! But it seems suspicious … are you sure you aren’t just saying you have big pores and white skin to make us feel better?
In the 80s my mom came home from work one day and said, “Don’tyou want to take off those white nylons!” I which I replied (with glare) “these are my legs!” I do have some color now, however, thanks to the lovely varicose veins that have popped up. Naturally, I have a horrid hair story too–but for CRYING out LOUD! Nothing like writing another post… so … without further ado … thanks for the tips! :)
Okay, wait … that sounded bad. I’m not saying your hair is horrid … yikes!
The lighter hair isn’t bad at all! It just doesn’t make your sparkle the way your darker shade does.
Pasty legs be damned. Who cares? I, too, am of the darker hair, ridiculously light skin camp (except for my arms. Arizona is SUNNY), and I say, put a little shimmer lotion on those gams and go to town. Just watch out for Twilight fans: They suffer from sexy shimmery summer leg/vampire confusion.
I once asked a stylist if I could go lighter and she just looked at me, grabbed my hair, and said, “Not if you want it to not all break off.” I immediately nixed any ideas of blond bombshellness. Now anytime I think I might want to go lighter, I look at pictures of Ava Gardner and get over it.
Jules-I dont’ think it’s that bad but I agree with you and everyone else…I like it the “regular” way! ;) And don’t kick yourself, I’ve done the very same thing!!!! Only I tried to do it myself!! LOL I’m going to have to find something to do with my hair b/c my grays are becoming quite aggressive. :/ And I don’t want to have to color every 3 days. Good luck with the “un-coloring” of your hair!
Have you tried Burt’s Bees tinted lip gloss? It’s slightly glossier than chapstick but not laquer glossy. And the color is just enough to rid you of ashy lips (or crusty crusts as I’ve heard them called) but not enough to make you look like you have 40s movie star lips.
I have a suggestion for lip color, too – I don’t like lipstick much (too matte/weird looking on me) but Clinique’s Butter Shine lipstick is the BEST. It’s super smooth and semi-glossy (but not Vaseline-shiny); the color is kind of sheer but saturated enough to perk up your complexion, and it’s relatively inexpensive. I get mine at Sephora. I have it in like 3 colors. Try it!
http://www.clinique.com/product/CATEGORY4903/PROD8997/Makeup/Lipsticks/index.tmpl
Carolyn–I have the same legs. In fact, maybe I should let Steve tell everyone in the comments what his dad said about my legs in high school when I was playing competitive tennis? No, I’LL DO IT.
“Steve, Julieta is a pretty girl but, DAMN, she’s got some big, white legs.”
WTF?! Note that Steve TOLD me this.
Becky–I LOVE Dita Von Tease. I used to pretend that I was pulling off her look until I saw pictures of myself. Yikes. I thought the really dark hair made me look older. Now that I have caramel apple hair, I’ll take old over burnt sugar any day! I need to try that Rimmel foundation. I hear great things about it and about the brand, in general.
Don’t anyone stop telling stories! That’s my favorite part–when we all share our respective horrors in the comments section.
I love that you all agree with my family and friends. It’s not HEINOUS but there is an immediate and obvious preference for my dark hair–pasty white skin be damned!
p.s. Can you believe how orange it makes my face look? And my lips! They always look at least pink. Now they just look…fleshy or peachy. GAG.
Kate–I will try that lip color, thanks! I have the same issue with lipstick, so I own ton of glosses that I wear (seriously, like 15) but they are TOO glossy and while the colors are nice and what I am looking for, they aren’t anything I can recommend due to the turkey leg factor.
I hate my legs and never wear shorts. I’d rather sweat than show my trunks.
I tried to go blonde and I was a brass head. With my yellowish skin, I just looked terrible. Plus, we lightened my brows to match and they disappered off my face. I need my brows for facial structure!! I covet your brows.
I went back to my natural mousy brown and am just going to learn to be happy with it. As much as I’d love to be more blonde, it’s just not in store for me. I’m just embracing what the good Lord gave me!
I love your dark hair, and you could pull off highlight this light if they were a different tone. They are a bit too warm for YOUR skin tone.
Ditto on the burts bees. Love their tinted balms. I’m always on the lookout for the perfect gloss-something a bit slick but not sticky. The MARK ones you click together are the closest I’ve found. I always get stuck on the color. I just want something that looks like my lips but BETTER!
It’s not so bad that you can’t go out in public, but I agree the dark works so much better for you.
And love your recommendations.
When I was in high school I had my friend box dye my naturally mousy brown hair blond. Only it came out orangey blond instead of the beautiful sunny blond I was expecting. So instead of trying to re-dye it back brown, I cut it. Short� about earlobe short. My best guy friend in the whole world was the first male to see me after my hair transformation and he said (and I quote) �you look like a boy�! So now I have vowed to NEVER dye my hair blond and cut it that short ever again. I will take my mousy brown hair over orangey blond any day.
As for your pale legs didn�t you hear� pale is the new tan. Thanks to Twilight and the fear of skin cancer. That is what I am believing so spread the world!
Thank you, Jules, THANK YOU. I can’t believe you even remembered this after being laid low with the stomach flu. My 37th birthday is TOMORROW, so I believe I will do a little makeup shopping expedition this evening while my mister bakes me a cake.
Really, my coloring is so close to yours (my mother was a Quaker from Indiana, of English descent, and my father from Ecuador, of Spanish/English descent)–dark dark brown hair and eyes, pale freckled skin. I was not blessed with good eyelashes, and how did you know I don’t care about my eyebrows?? So I really appreciate you sharing your makeup and hair color adventures….I’ve been covering my gray with L’Oreal Excellence Cream in Dark Brown Natural, because every time I try something a little different, I regret it. “OMG, doesn’t my hair look orange?”
Okay, I need to go browse your picks before my natives get restless (that is, before Hi-5 ends on Discovery Kids).
I have smudging problems, too! I’ve tried so many mascaras and always have the same end result. You know it’s a problem when you come home from work (after a hiatus of wearing mascara you decide to give it a try again and you’re feeling pretty good about being “made up”) and your husband sees you, gives you a hug and says “oooh, I like the goth look”. What?! Goth look? Me? Why do I look goth? “Well, you’re wearing black and you have smudged eyes”. Great. Um, not the look I was going for.
I attribute my smudgy-ness on having long lashes and oily skin. I believe that when I put on mascara, my lashes touch the bottom of my eyes and leave a bit of mascara behind. Possibly that’s what is happening to you? My new routine for my eyes is to wear a little eye liner, curl my lashes and use clear mascara. It still makes the eyes pop without the raccoon look at the end of the day.
Karrie–I think that is my problem, too. My lashes are long, and I think they touch and smudge. Do you have problems wearing sunglasses with mascara? I do. I always have to wear glasses with the adjustable nose pieces because most glasses (the ones with the built in plastic bridge) sit very close to the eyes/face.
I concur wth everyone. Your darker hair did look better – however, this is definately not terrible. And, its very nice that a colorist would suggest to color it back and help out! all the colorists I have been to pretend to like it even though my hair had seen better days right after they touched it!
My horrid story is this – when i was in college and actually wore somewhat lowcut shirts, a guy that I knew (but not very well) – actually had the nerve to come up to me and say “They are very pale, but nice”. Um, hello??? hahaha – my friends still tease me about that one. No more lowcut shirts for me! : )
Have you ever tried YSL mascara? I love it – but maybe its because it plumps up my lashes and makes them look thick? You probably dont need that. Anyway, its a bit expensive but so worth it and I always buy it online and always find great deals (30-40% cheaper than stores)
I don’t think it looks bad. I don’t even necessarily think you should go back to DARK hair. I bet you could go lighter with a different shade (maybe a brown that’s a few shades lighter than the rest of your hair?) and it would look fantastic.
However, the main thing is not what your husband or your family and friends or even what some random strangers from the internet think…but what YOU think. ;-)
I don’t really have any hair horror stories, but I have a couple of hmm-maybe-I-should-have-thought-this-through stories which I will now share. When I was in high school there was a trend for blondes to dye their hair with Kool-Aid (no sugar required). Once I left my hair in the Kool-Aid solution a bit too long, and the color never really washed out. Months later I had checkers at ShopKo squinting at my head and asking, “Did you know there’s a red stripe in your hair?”
Another time, when I was an adult and really should have known better, I used one of those at-home semi-permanent haircolors to brighten my hair. The shade I chose was too light for my hair, though, and even though those semi-permanent dyes aren’t supposed to lighten your hair, this one did. A lot. I learned my lesson, though. I went to my stylist to get it fixed a couple of months down the road when the roots were really obvious, and I never played with home haircolor again.
Love the five minutes flat face. Mine is moisturizer mixed with a drop of foundation + eye liner + mascara + tinted gloss. That’s all the world’s getting from me on a daily basis!
And I think your hair looks good. Not bad at all.
Yea a beauty post! I am so wanting to get my paws on that primer! The tangerine wedge comment? I didn’t notice anything until you pointed it out, hah! I actually thought you had lightened your hair for the BSP photo’s, just sunlight, eh? I went blond once (I had a client who specialized in taking brunettes to blonds). I thought I would look like Bridgette Bardot but I looked like something out of a Stephen King flick. I love your natural coloring, you are beautiful and your skin always looks dewy and perfect in your photo’s. I don’t think this is awful but I DO understand not loving your hair after you come from the salon. That’s the worse. Thank you for the tips, so fun to see other people’s routines!
T–it was highlighted. I did it months ago, and it was very subtle. I thought it was a bit too caramely for my skin, but it looked good (I thought) in the pictures. I figured, why not just do what I have, but a little more? Bad thought.
p.s. My skin isn’t dewy or perfect, but I do have nice skin. More importantly, I ONLY post pictures of myself where I look good, and if the full size version shows off too many pores or impefections, I reduce the size before I publish it so you can’t enlarge it. Just being honest. :)
Who is Steve and what a horri comment from his dad. I feel your pain. I have withered those hockers down since working out and getting off a horrendous medication that made me balloon up like no other..but they will always be ‘thick’. and my husband is naturally slim and his legs are better shaped than mine. and thinner.
had to comment about the cousin it remark. laughed out loud in the office. love when that happens!
You and me, sister – olive complexions and black eyes. We need dark hair. Even when we’re pale (and I’m ALWAYS pale because I live “where the sun don’t shine.”)
Dark brown is where it’s at. It makes you look exotic. And like someone else said – the darker color made your eyes sparkle more.
I’m glad you documented the experiment though! Now when you want highlights in 5 years you can come back to this post. Whenever I start thinking I want bangs I go look at photos from Spring 2007. No bangs, no.
I have to agree with everybody else: it doesn’t look ugly but it doesn’t look like YOU. Your dark hair, eyebrows and eyes are a winning combo :) You’re always lovely anyway!
Yeah…no. Sorry. I feel your pain. I’ve got the same coloration, only with green eyes. Just can’t do the blonde, it never works out. I agree with the previous poster who said “good thing you documented it so you won’t be tempted again later”.
Thanks for your beauty routine! Good tips! I love love LOVE this cheap-and-dirty lip liner. It’s by Wet and Wild and it is number 666 (creepy…). It’s like, 0.99. I do that over Chapstick and then put that Rose Balm that comes in the funky tin over it (what’s it called? they sell it at Anthropologie and Urban Outfitters and Target). Anyway, it’s very soft and very natural. Just barely a shade darker than naked, but gives that necessary definition.
Ok, so it’s not horrid, but it’s not the best tone for you.
Once when I was fresh out of high school I decided that my style icon was Meg Ryan. Now mind you this was 1997 Meg Ryan, not the 2010 botox beast of today. But that is neither here nor there. In any case for some unknown reason I thought it would be a good idea to perm my hair ala “City of Angels”.
I don’t know why. I still don’t know why. All I know is that I ended up being a poodle-haired freak with braces.
hee hee. Isn’t it INSANE what we all do to look good?
My skin is so very white, that they called me Casper in highschool. Now, at 50, my un tanned skin has retained it’s youth, except, I AM STILL WHITE AS WHITE can be and my legs look awful.
DOWN WITH PANTYHOSE!
I think it’d be better with less of the highlights. It’s like the stylist went foil happy just to lighten it. Smaller lights, and a little darker brown. :-)
As for the pale legs, hon… I have decided as a pale red-head that I have become one with my paleness. I’m embracing the alabaster skin [with the occasional help of Jergens gradual tan lotion.] :-)
I hope you find a happy medium for you and everyone else on your current hair issues. :-)
Not horrible, but not great. Ugh, hair color. I’m still trying to find the right shade of red, but I may give up and go back to my own pale skin & dark brown hair. I suspect the red doesn’t look as good as I (sort of) think it does anyway. :(
I have very dark hair and very light skin. I think you always look beautiful in your pictures. The lighter hair is not horrible but your regular color looks so much better.
You’re not pale, you’re FAIR and lovely! As in all the famous brunettes of history: Jackie O, Ava Gardner, Snow White, Vivian Leigh…I could go on and on. As one (formerly unsuccessful highlighted) fair brunette to another, ROCK OUT your pretty dark locks! You’re beautiful! Have you tried red lips? I like to pencil mine in with Sienna by Revlon then fill them in with a faint red lipstick like Lancome’s Blossom Bouquet. It does wonders for a light olive complexion and makes the whole anemic thing go away. Trust me!!! xoxo
This is kind of amusing to me…seems a rather large percentage of your readership shares the dark-hair-fair-skin combo. Do we tend to read the blogs of people who resemble us?
lip gloss–Fresh Sugar. my sister gave me one and it’s great for a touch of moisture/color without the turkey leg problem. I layer that over my lip stain/cheek stain b/c I’m likely to forget to reapply any make up all day long.
Jules—
I’m in agreement.. and you shouldn’t fret. Really, when was the last time a light haired PLUS white skinned person (ME!) was a princess like Snow White? Seriously.. you should be thankful. I have the blessing of having fair and dry skin at the same time. Deadly combo..skin cancer and wrinkles waiting to happen. Then, add on the blonde, and my eyebrows are a thing of the past. Thankfully, they’ve gotten darker and now they are a very dirty blonde, so atleast they are visisble. Trust me, it could be worse.
As for the horror stories.. I cannot re-live them. My brain has blocked them from memory. But, I have one (hyphenated) word. Sun-in.
As for make-up.. I second the Fresh Sugar; but I use the rose-tinted gloss, which is much more like chapstick but better. Actually, I am a huge fan of all products Fresh. Mascara.. I use Clinique’s Long and Pretty. I use Cetaphil plus sunscreen daily moisturizer (sensitive skin…) for the day and Ole Henrikson products at night. You should try his line. They are all natural and are really fabulous.
No worries about your hair. It’s not bad, AT ALL!!! But, I need to agree that I like it darker better. It suits you, I think. You can leave it for a few more days to see if it grows on you..but if not, fix it. Life is too short to have a continual bad hair day. :)
We fair skinned, dark haired beauties need to have a convention! I have super pale blue eyes to go with mine though. Guys in high school always asked me if I ever went out in the sun; I told them sunlight was bad for vampires. I now live in sunny, sunny Tucson and still maintain my fair complexion – ok, truth, it won’t tan even when I try. I gave up trying years ago.
I have that eyeglasses and eyelashes problem too. And I wear glasses all the time.
Any other “high contrast coloring” women out there have problems finding lipstick/lipgloss that doesn’t just disappear? My naked lips don’t have much color. I’d love to wear tinted balm (I’ve tried Burt’s Bees) but it never has enough tint to make much of a difference.
I’ve gone totally blonde before. The key thing to pulling it off (besides an uber talented colorist and buckets of conditioner) is changing your makeup colors and probably the colors you wear next to your face. Not that I’m planning on taking that trip again!