Pancakes and French Fries
Posted by Jules on Sunday, December 16, 2012 · 11 Comments
Filed under Health, Spirit · 11 Comments
Thank you, Jules. I know that people deal with tragedy in different ways but I’m almost offended at bloggers who are going about their “business” without a nod to the heartache in our nation right now. Thank you for taking your space to grieve those babies and their heroes.
I have been very vocal about this on Twitter and Facebook, and of course it has cost me followers. I don’t care, and since this is my blog, I’ll say it again here: I think the “business as usual” stance is a steaming pile of bullshit. I’ve heard the position that people grieve in different ways; that there are obligations to fulfill; that we can’t put our lives on hold for every tragedy or we would never move. This is all true, but in this case I view it as an excuse to justify behavior without compassion. I’m going to go out on a limb and call this an extenuating circumstance: twenty young children and six adults were murdered in cold blood. That doesn’t happen every day outside war and religious conflict. Side note: if a company ever compelled me to proceed with a blogging obligation in the midst of a tragedy like this one, I would tell them to bite me. That is not a company with which I am interested in maintaining a business relationship.
If it were their very young child murdered days before Christmas, would it be business as usual to promote the giveaway or ebook or 15% + free shipping sale mere hours after the tragedy unfolded? How about as the tragedy unfolded, before we knew who and how many were dead? Because that happened, too.
Toss the kids and families of this unspeakable tragedy a bone.
Like you said, give a nod to their heartache. Stop promoting yourself until Monday. Just Monday! Give your brand a break for two days and be glad this tragedy is so far removed from you that you have the luxury of feeling like it didn’t really happen. Your business will survive two days.
This isn’t just bloggers, and I am willing to give a few of them a pass on this one. (Not many, a few.) There were major corporations with the audacity to continue with their automated tweets as everything unfolded. I was trying to figure out how many children died and if there were any survivors at the same time Better Homes & Garden was telling me how to make a Christmas tree skirt out of burlap. This is inexcusable behavior from a major corporation. Inexcusable, inexcusable, inexcusable.
Everyone handles grief differently, and one of those ways is to turn a blind eye and retreat into a false sense of normalcy. I get that. Hell, I’ve done that. But the day we as people can point to self promotion and marketing as a valid way to express grief is the day we have lost our humanity.
I could not agree with your more. If you, or your readers, have any suggestions on how individuals can get “involved” (I’m not even sure what that means right now) in effecting change I’d love to hear it. I sit here, fuming and feeling impotent to make any difference, thinking there MUST be a way to channel these emotions, feelings and at some point my dollars into change. Surely there is SOMETHING individuals can do.
Do I think we should be making this a big deal? Yes. Do I think we should be having a serious conversation about how we deal with mental illness and gun control? Yes. Do I think we to need to address these serious happenings in a serious way that can keep them from happening again? Yes.
That said, I’m one of the guilty ones who had a scheduled tweet go out so I might feel just a little bit defensive about this. I’m not a brand, I’m not a shop or a blog trying to promote myself to make money, I’m just a mom who blogs because I like to write. And when I heard about what happened the last place I thought about going was to my social media scheduling site to delete a couple of posts. Insensitive, perhaps, but LIFE.
I get people wanting to bury their head in the sand. I’ve buried my head in the sand. I still haven’t read or watched or heard a snippet of news coverage on it because I’ve simply cried enough WITHOUT any more information than I already have.
Thank you, Jules. Thank you for your tender heart during this terrible time.
Amen & Amen.
Though I wish there were. I wish there were words to take the ache away . . .
Thank you for being who you are. I completely agree with what you have said and have so much respect for you.
With regard to this tragedy, someone said “evil has visited us”. Does anyone feel like I do, that mental illness visited? Or did the devil inhabit this young man and therefore it’s the work of “evil”. I am struggling with this. The loss includes the loss of him and his mother. Something failed them too. I don’t think it’s a black and white story.
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I used to be an attorney, but it made me grumpy. Now I write about life, sweet and savory, as a wife and mother to two small boys. My knowledge of dinosaurs knows no bounds.
You can read more, including the meaning behind the name Pancakes and French Fries here. And, yes, I really am phenomenally indecisive.
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