I have never had a fancy cell phone. All my cell phones have been of the “free with plan” variety and I always use them until they are within an inch of total system failure. Last November, at my youngest brother’s wedding, my other younger brother couldn’t help but take pity on my uncool state.
Brother: “Jules, where’s the camera mechanism on your phone?”
Jules: “It doesn’t have a camera.”
Brother: “No camera?! Do they make phones without cameras?”
Jules: “They’re hard to find, but when I was going to court the rules were no camera phones.”
Brother: “OK. But what about the antenna?”
Jules: “Oh. Well. That. I kept fiddling with it, broke it, and then lost it. But I still get reception. Most of the time.”
Brother: “Jules. Seriously. This is embarrassing. I’m getting you a new phone.”
Turns out he wasn’t kidding. Look at what he dropped off at my parents’ house on his way to a conference.
It’s the iPhone-ish phone for people who live in Verizon coverage areas. I have no idea how to use it, but am I the worst person ever to be so excited about a stupid phone? Maybe it’s not just the phone, but also the pride I feel for my little brother. Here is the shy kid I used to beat up on relentlessly. The guy I used to make fun for always playing his stupid video games (mainly as a way to deflect attention from the fact he always beat my ass in said stupid video games).
It turns out that if you are very gifted at playing video games, companies will hire you as a producer and pay you handsomely to manage a team of designers and coders who create all sorts of cool video games. These companies then pass on all sorts of cool perks to their invaluable producers. Perks like, for instance, access to really cool phones that you can pass on to your not-so-cool older sister.
Thanks again, lil’ bro. I’m really, really proud of you.
Jules the Bulls
p.s. Youngest lil’ bro who just got married in November, you’re not exactly chopped liver, either. :)