[Original portions of this post have been edited to protect the privacy of others.]
I am back from a meeting in which I discussed with several females attorneys a plan to get me licensed and active within the community. I’ve been nervous about this meeting since the day I scheduled it; the day the Mister was laid off. I’ve been out of the loop for years. I have few contacts, and limited practical knowledge. For nights on end I have worried if I could do it–if I could start a law practice on my own and not worry constantly about looking stupid, inexperienced.
I am afraid my need to be perfect will stop me from trying. It wouldn’t be the first time the voice in my head said I can’t do this.
But I didn’t say any of that. Instead, we discussed at length the money it would take, the areas of practice I should consider, and the most effective ways to gain business in a down economy.
We also discussed how someone’s kids are in trouble and how someone else is getting a divorce and how someone else spends too much money while someone else is very cheap and, oh, someone else doesn’t seem very motivated, does she?
Then we moved back to me, and they told me I was bright, and easy to get along with, and someone they could count on to do a great job. After listening to them pull me up and pat my back and sing my praises I started to believe them, and as I walked to the car with one of the women I thought to myself I can do this, I know I can
When I got in my car I caught sight of a picture of Mikey and Nico as I was buckling my seat belt. I looked up and watched the other woman pull out of the parking and head off to to deal with something a mother shouldn’t have to deal with. I can do this, I thought. But can I do it all?