There are two flavors I absolutely loathe: root beer and melons.
Root beer makes me gag. It gives me an instant headache. When we were first dating The Mister watched me nearly convulse over a restaurant mix-up with his root beer and my Diet Coke, an event that triggered his 13 year-old boy gene to fire off like a missile. He made it his mission from that point forward to get me to “accidentally” drink it again. No way, no how. I started sniffing my drinks for poison like a king without his royal tester.
The crazy continues. A year or two ago I drove through McDonald’s and asked for a Diet Coke. As I drove away, I took a drink. Then I slammed on the breaks and almost died. Root beer! I pulled around and waited in the drive through–again–and returned that vile beverage. The girl at the window couldn’t understand the mix up (a likely excuse, I thought) but gave me another Diet Coke. As I drove away, I took a drink. Root beer!! [Looks at sky and shakes fist.] I went back to the end of the line and waited. When I got to the front, they said it was impossible because they didn’t sell root beer. I told them I didn’t care if it was root beer, Mr. Pibb, Dr. Pepper, or Sarsaparilla, I tasted something that made my tongue recoil. As it turned out, in the very early morning they had the Diet Coke and Mr. Pibb lines switched, but since that was so long ago, they couldn’t understand how I could still taste it. Simple. I hate root beer at a molecular level.
Same thing with melons. I just can’t stand them. Cantaloupe? Vulgar. Not even wrapped in prosciutto. Watermelon? Disgusting. It’s like chewing a wet sponge. Honeydew? Honey, don’t. Move along, melon. Your kind is not wanted here.
Until August, when I fell in love with a watermelon salad and the world stopped making sense.
I don’t know where I saw the recipe, maybe Better Homes and Gardens? And it’s not like I haven’t seen it a million times before. It’s a classic summer salad: watermelon, red onion, blue cheese, olive oil, vinegar, pepper, and a touch of fresh mint. But this time I thought it looked…downright palatable. I thought about it for a couple of weeks to see if it was just a passing fancy, and when I caught myself looking longingly at the watermelons, I caved.
Looking longingly at a watermelon! As if it was a Dairy Queen Blizzard (chocolate, with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups)!
The horror. The horror.
I’ve been in love with wet sponges and moldy cheese every since. I leave out the mint and red onion. They take three extra seconds and that’s three extra seconds too many for me. In trying to find the original recipe that flipped my world off its axis, I’ve come across a slew of variations, many of which keep it as simple as the version I now make. I know I’m silly for posting a watermelon recipe at the end of summer when you’re about 11 months from seeing another decent melon, but it’s taken me this long to finally admit that I kind of like watermelon. Kind of. Only in certain applications. That’s as much of a confession you’re going to get from me today.
- 2 cups chopped, seedless watermelon
- 2 teaspoons(s) coconut vinegar (I recently started using this and I love it, but anything light, like champagne vinegar would work well)
- 2 teaspoons(s) extra-virgin olive oil
- Pepper
- 1-2 ounce(s) Trader Joe’s raw blue cheese, crumbled (that’s just what I use.)
Watermelon and Blue Cheese Salad
Mix all ingredients in a bowl and toss gently.
Mmmm… moldy cheese! Although, I don’t know … it seems a bit like sacrilege to add it with watermelon. I should totally be brave … I should … be brave …
you’re ridiculous, not liking melon. Weirdo, freak, I don’t think we can be friends. oh, okay, maybe I’ll make an exception with you. ;) Like I tweeted, I love a watermelon and feta mix, so would probably really dig the blue cheese mix too. Or perhaps a little Gorgonzola? Ah, the power of cheese . It makes anything better…
Ok, this looks totally disgusting. But, I may try it. Because I like bleu cheese. And because I discovered, through you, that avocados with vinegar is yummy. :-)
edit: *are* yummy. {not is}
I’m totally with you on the root beer/dr. pepper front–even thinking about them I feel like gagging. But, on the melon front we are night and day. I love melon. Especially watermelon. In the summer time, I eat it almost every day for breakfast and I’m sad melon season has come to an end. If you like the salty-sweet aspect of the melon and blue cheese, you should try watermelon and cottage cheese. So good! I tried a watermelon salsa recipe this year that was so good (we ate it with chips but it would be so good on a piece of grilled white fish).
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Watermelon-Fire-and-Ice-Salsa/Detail.aspx
I love coconut vinegar! I even use it when I make chocolate cake. I’m not sure what brand I have, but the design on the bottle is cute, too.
Ha! This post made me laugh! xoxoxo
Unlikely combination which will likely taste great. I’m trying it this weekend if I can get around to a supermarket. By the way, chocolate blizzard with Reese’s peanut butter cups: my favorite. Used to have one every other day back in the college years, with extra Reese’s please (my waist was kind enough to show it).
You and root beer? That’s me and coconut. I can detect coconut as the 38th ingredient listed in a cookie. So, you almost lost me at coconut vinegar (I didn’t know there was such a thing!). Otherwise this sounds yummy!
I LOVE coconut, but a lot of people don’t. Coconut vinegar doesn’t taste like coconut (just like apple cider vinegar doesn’t taste like apples) but if you are like me and root beer, that won’t help. If someone told me there was root beer vinegar but it didn’t taste like root beer I would agree take their word for it (because I sure as hell won’t try it).
Um, yeah, I’ll take your word for it. We’re like the Princess and the Pea, but with flavors. (And I’ll add anise and coffee to my list.). My husband will buy some new flavored, syrupy, ice-creamy drink at a coffee bar and say, “But you can’t even taste the coffee.” Dude, I can smell it from here, forget it.
I have the same reaction to root beer, always have. I learned as a teenager that the reason I have such a strong reaction to it is because I am allergic to one of the ingredients, anise. It explained why I always came down with a migraine whenever I had root beer or black licorice, or accidentally ate fennel.
oh man i love love this salad. i have been making this similar type of salad for years. i love watermelon and of course any kind of moldy cheese! lol
I love rootbeer AND melon but I have to say this salad does not in the least bit look appealing to me. I get the whole sweet/salty thing with the melon and the cheese but I can’t wrap my head around this one. I had to laugh at the Mc Donalds story though. You know what they say, ” They always screw ya’ the drive through.”
I can’t say there are many flavors/textures I don’t like, just don’t put an oyster or lima bean on my plate!
Jules, You carry the rootbeer hate in your blood. Every single SouthAmerican I know HATES rootbeer. With a passion! I made rootbeer floats for all my friends at a language school I used to work at and the Colombians were like “Why would you mix ice cream with medecine?” My husband blames this on there being a medecine in Colombia that tastes like rootbeer. I feel the same way about anise flavored drinks. I’m like “If I wanted that, I’d just swig some Nyquil”
Update!
Emily reminded me that above all, I hate black licorice/anise. Of course, that’s one of the major flavors in root beer, so maybe it’s the same thing. One time we were in Mexico and I got sick enough that I had to buy Pepto. Actually I think I just had too much cheese (I’m lactose intolerant). ANYWAY, the point is I drank some Pepto and almost died. DIED. It tasted like a combo of licorice and root beer. [shudder]
I completely agree. I HATE root beer, melon, and black licorice. And I always feel like the only one.
I wonder if everybody’s taste tends to break down into groups like that.
I would have turned around again and again until they admitted their wrong too. Well done.
Cantaloupes rule though.. so more for me : )
This same kind of thing happened to me with guacamole a few years ago – spent 30+ years despising avacados, then suddenly couldn’t get enough. Still my favorite snack. I dream about it!
Then this summer I suddenly developed a passion for fresh, raw tomatoes. I had worked my way very, very slowly up the tomato-tolerance chain over the years from ketchup, to pizza sauce, to salsa, to pasta sauce, to pico de gallo, to tiny raw tomatoes in with other foods, and occasionally tomato soup with a lot of cheese – but I never in a million years thought I would roll out of bed in the morning and head straight for a sliced tomato with salt. Not coffee, not cereal, but a TOMATO. And then repeat two or three more times during the day!
But at least these are good things I’m craving nowadays instead of the starchy and sweet things I used to live and die for!
P.S. I HATE watermelon and honeydew (the smell makes me retch), but I do like canteloupe. I’m not brave enough to try your salad. If I liked it, I would probably write to the Enquirer and swear that I had been abducted by aliens and had my taste buds switched with those of Elvis’s 900 lb. love baby or something.
Ha. this makes me laugh so hard, because I have the same hate for root beer!!
But the funniest part is that the EXACT SAME scenario happened when I accidentally got his root beer and he got my diet coke, and he constantly tries to switch it up on me. I had to learn your trick quick as well. I have smelled my drinks when he brings them to me for the last 7 years! :)
OK. I tried the watermelon and blue cheese combo and did onions and mint. Could not find coconut vinegar so I used a pinot grigio vinegar. I took a chance and took it to my sister-in-law’s dinner tonight. The veredict: the women loved it, the men thought it was weird.
PS: as a fellow Southamerican, I share the strong dislike for root beer. Whoever came up with that flavor should be banned from making up any other flavors!