I heard about the Twilight Saga a year or so ago.� You would have to live under a rock (or a coffin! ba-da-dum) to have missed the collective sigh from teen-aged girls across the world.� What surprised me was that in that sigh I could also hear the moans of women, particularly mothers, in their 30s.
My first encounter with a vocal “Twilight Mom” happened last year during Mikey’s Thanksgiving feast at preschool.� The movie was set to release that night and she was positively apoplectic with anticipation.� She was helping my friend, Judi, and I set the table for 37 walking petri dishes when she burst.
“I just, I just, I just can’t even wait.� Are you Twilight fans?”� The last sentence came out in a heady rush.
“No, can’t say that I am.� I haven’t read any of the books.”� I couldn’t keep the smug tone out of my voice.� Hah!� You won’t catch me making such a stay-at-home-mom move like that.� Never.
“The movie tickets go on sale tonight and my friends and I are going to stand in line.� I was hoping I could just talk to some people about the series until then.� I just love it so much…”
A paper napkin slipped from my fingers and fluttered slowly to the knee-high table before me.� Judi and I shared a glance that said this woman might be one taco short of a combo plate.� I couldn’t resist playing a little bit with the crazy.
“I don’t really get the appeal.� So, like, it’s about a 100+ year old vampire having sex with a teenager?”
Twilight Mom gasped.� “Oh no!� Edward would never do that.� He’s a perfect gentleman.”
Okay.� Done playing with crazy.� I have a personal rule against antagonizing strangers who defend paper characters as real, living, people.� I call it The Rule of 5150, and I employed it immediately.
Months went by, and I continued to hear testimonies from devoted fans.� I was starting to lose my patience.� Mainly because I knew I would eventually have to read at least the first book because, petulant child that I am, I hate to be on the outside of a conversation.� I decided last Tuesday to pick up the first book and see what all the fuss was about.
On Sunday I finished book 4 and the draft of book 5 you can find on Stephanie Meyer’s website.� Then I watched the movie.
My metamorphosis into suburban stay-at-home-mom is almost complete.� Next week I am going to buy wedge flip-flops and capri pants.
Hello how could no one comment on this yet? This may be one of my favorite posts you’ve ever written. Thank goodness I am at work by myself today, I was a hyena there for a sec…I can’t wait to see the capri’s and wedge flip flops. Are Croc’s so last Tuesday?
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Does the speed at which you read all of the books (including the draft of book 5) mean that you LIKED the books? I resisted almost as long as you did ~ till about this February, I think. I loved the books, but don’t worry, I’m still not wearing wedge flip flops and capri’s.
I did! The post was getting long–as all my posts usually are–so I had mercy on all of you and broke it up into two posts.
The books were like candy, and exactly what I needed last week since I am off the sugar. :) Glad to hear there is still hope for me on the wedge flip-flops.
I am you, pre-Twilight fest. Maybe one day I’ll take the leap. Right now, I’m going to throw out my capris. =)
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Deidra, I double dog dare you to read the first one. ;)
Don’t do it, Jules!!! No wedge flip-flops!!! lol! :) Haven’t read the books, I’m terrified of vampire-related books. . . . .
If you start wearing charm braclets with mini-kids hanging off of them….I’m out.
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I was not about to read some teen stuff since I’ve never liked teen anything but with 2 girls pre and almost pre teen I knew I needed to be armed first. On a random clickfest I happened to come across the movie online so I watched it. It is a beautifully shot movie. The colors, locales and mood are gorgeous. It’s not too teenybopper at all. Now I’m waiting to see the rest of the movies. They should just release them all in a cluster, yea, that’s what I say.
Twilight?
Do you also read real vampire novels? ;)
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No way, Caitlin! Aren’t they scary? Which is a funny thing for me to ask, actually, since I love suspense/murder mystery and at one point was addicted to all the forensic shows on TLC/Discory–the ones where they show the actual autopsy. O_O
Sorry, I can’t read Twilight books. My head and heart are too full of Harry Potter.
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hahaha i had similar feelings about the whole series. 5 days and 4 books later, i was hooked. however, despite their addicting quality, the books are so poorly written and that movie was an abomination! they’re not quite up to harry potter snuff but still a fun way to spend time in the summer.
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i tried to be open-minded, i really did.
but, honestly?
it was in the top five of the worst movies i have ever seen.
horribly melodramatic, ridiculously over-acted and poorly directed.
i tried. i really did.
Sara Jane– EXACTLY! I call the Twilight Series my Reeses Peanut Butter Cups + Popcorn. No good, but so easy to swallow. They are totally fun, and you have to read them knowing it won’t be Jorge Louis Borges. ;)
Krista–that movie was one of the worst I have ever seen, too. It has nothing to do with the books, which, yes, are bad in their own way.
Jules, I am with you, I read all four books within a week. And I am a forty something Mom! Don’t own any flip-flops btw, but do have some capris.
What a great post Jules – I was reading right along and then got to the last sentence about the wedge flip flops & capri pants. That’s when I suddenly burst into laughter! OMG. I’ve got the capri pants – but they’re mostly cargo-type capris. No wedge flip flops – can’t wear heels. Heck I topple off my tennis shoes some days. But my advice to you is this: if you DO go with the capris & wedge flip flops, you must also procure the acrylic-squared-off-french-tip manicure. All three go together. It’s a package. :-P
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Scary? Not unless you get a thriller/vampire book instead of the more common adventure/vampire or romance/vampire ones.
I eat thriller books for breakfast, anyway. Well, medical thrillers, anyway. I’m not so keen on reading about the maniac-wielding-a-knife slashers.
The shows where they show actual autopsies and surgeries are awesome. My husband won’t watch ’em with me, though. :(
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I stood in line for that midnight showing with my wacky friends. I haven’t read it, but they’ve ALL read it. I couldn’t stand the movie… “spider monkey”…
Anyway – I’m still digging my heels in deep, but how fun for you to get lost in those crystal blue eyes and skin that shimmers like diamonds… :)
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That is great! I liked the series too. If you like vampire and history, I would suggest you read the Saint Germain series by Chelsea Quinn Yarbro. She really gets her history and St. Germain doesn’t kill when he gets his blood. Now not everyone likes her books. She does a mix of story via letters. I would suggest Hotel Transylvania. If you can’t get it, let me know and I’ll let you borrow my copy.
Muahahaha I knew we’d get you sooner or later.
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Welcome to the dark side!
I hate, hate, hated the movie. But, the books- oh gosh…
I agree, you must have the pedi-capri-wedge trifecta. That is the in the suburban house wive’s manual. Didn’t you read your copy?
I can’t really say anything because I haven’t read them yet and I too am guilty of Harry Potter fever… movie 6 out soon gals!!
..but I love that you included a Van Halen reference (5150) in the same post as flip-flops : )
My mother had the best quote about the first book: “I just couldn’t put it down, and once I was done reading it, I couldn’t for the life of me remember why…” I read all of them and was pretty addicted. But I still knew that they were pretty cringe-worthy from a writing standpoint… I just wanted to know what happened! Then of course I wanted to see the movie. But long after it left the theaters so I had to settle for Netflix.
My biggest takeaway: Renesme is the most ridiculous name I’ve ever heard.
Didn’t read any of the books but I do wear capris and just bought wedge canvas shoes with the toe cut out (I don’t know what that’s called) – is that close to wedge flip flops? And I was just asked to transport my sons friend to a birthday party. Isn’t that officially like a carpool? Oh and I have to bring snacks to t-ball on Saturday. Would someone tell me how this all happens so quickly? Next thing you know I’ll be driving a mini van.
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I read the books. They are like crack you become an addict before you know it you have finished the last book wanting more. Sure the writing maybe not up to a college graduate level and the movies are dumbed down….but it is still addicting. I am still excited to see the next few movies…I like to compare the differences.
I am no SAHM but I wear wedges because I am under 5’2″ and I love capris! Does that make me suburban housewife even though I live in the city?
Good to know I am not the only person who jumped the Twilight bandwagon late!
Hey, I’ve been a lurker here for months. I don’t know if I’ve ever commented before (I tend to comment pretty sporadically), but now I definitely feel like chiming in!
I started reading Twilight a couple months ago. I’ve only finished with the first two books, since I haven’t gotten around to getting the last two, but I agree with what seems to be the common sentiment that I like these books against my better judgment. They’re so easy to read, I was finishing those books in just a few sittings. Other books, even Harry Potter, I feel require more frequent pauses to absorb all of the information. With Twilight, it’s so simple that such pauses just aren’t needed. Maybe I’m the only one who feels this way. ;)
I recently ordered The Strain: Book One of The Strain Trilogy off of Amazon. It involves vampires of the scary variety and is co-written by Guillermo Del Toro. I love everything he touches, so I’m excited. I’m ready for some scary after reading Twilight.
This is just great. Now I’m the only 30 something woman on the planet who hasn’t read these books. I still refuse. Now it’s just a matter of principle. I’m stubborn like that!
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LOL, I resisted Harry Potter long after most of my friends/family had fallen victim. Of course I loved the series. Am sure I will enjoy Twilight too, we actually have it in the house (my Husband of all people has already read it!) so it’s just a matter of finding some quiet time to read..
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Hilarious.
I read the books because I teach middle school girls, and they got into them a few years ago (before all the hoopla, because their tastes are so discerning). In fact, when Stephanie Meyer was touring to promote New Moon I took my girls to see her at a local bookstore, and they dressed up as characters from the book (including the boys). As their reward for raising the most money in our annual Trick or Treat for Unicef I took the 8th grade to see the movie this fall. (They’re good kids – we snickered through it together.)
Yeah, they’re trash, but they’re also amazingly and inexplicably appealing.
Next up for you: “The Host”, Meyer’s “adult” novel which has a heroine as annoying as Bella in the first books, but comes up with a pretty good reason for it, and the Outlander series. Because if you’re going to indulge in trash, it should be only the best trash.
Holy crap – I meant to comment on this right after you posted. Looks like there is a lot of passion out there for Twilight. I too am an enormous fan of Twilight (*cough*Edward*cough). It sounds ridiculous, but I actually was restless… achey… sad… I don’t know quite how to describe it. But after reading the books, I just felt such a huge longing for the FICTIONAL character. Mmmmm… Edward.
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ha! so awesome. I have taken the suburban mom plunge just yet with this series but I am fixing to this summer :) My daughter (12) has read them all including the online piece maybe 3 or 4 times.
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I loved, loved Twilight
I so feel you. I was so embaressed for everybody I knew that was reading them. And then I fell into it too. And now I can’t stop.
I laughed out loud. And snorted!