I’m the mom who’s friendly, easy going, and remembers your child’s name. I’ll greet you every morning, ask you about the weather, and email links and articles I think will interest you. But, unless I’ve known you for 20 years and you are part of my inner circle, that’s as far as it goes.
I don’t do lunch. I don’t do parks. I don’t do mom groups, Gymboree, Little Gym, or Musical Munchkins. I am a recluse. Imagine my horror, then, when this morning I received a call from a mom on Mikey’s soccer team. The team that started just last week. She wanted Mikey to have a play date with her son today at 1:15. Nicholas goes down for a nap at that point, so I told her it wouldn’t work…but that [gulp] Mikey would love to do a play date any time this week or next in the mid-morning.
She suggested tomorrow morning. I agreed, and started to feel woozy.
I suggested a park in the area. She said to just come over to her house. I agreed, and then passed out.
Tomorrow the boys and I are headed over to the house of a person I have known for all of 30 minutes on Saturday. Do normal people invite into their home people they don’t know? Is this what social people do? I can only assume she’s burned through all her friends and spotted me, fresh meat, from across a green soccer field. I picture the worst: me sitting next to a prized Precious Moments collection while 3 of 17 cats weave in and out of my trembling legs. Then, my hostess will remark casually that little Colin was up all night throwing up, but he was so excited for his play date she didn’t have the heart to cancel.
Indeed, I fear my hostess tomorrow is:
- A swinger.
- A Shacklee representative.
- A Scientologist.
- A serial killer.
I called the Mister to express my concerns and remind him where I keep a copy of my life insurance policy. He wasn’t as quick to make the connection between play date and fiery depths of Hell. Instead, he had the audacity to suggest my hostess could also just be a nice mom thinking about starting a book club. Yeah, right. What are the odds?
As always, Jules…LOL LOL!!
You are soooooo funny, but seriously, take a Valium and go. I met some of my closest companions as the parent of a Boy Scout, or from the PTA board or gymnastics lessons. Since we had so much in common (kids) and our values were similar, we became friends, and now it’s 20 years later, our kids hardly know each other and we are still friends.
But you will hit upon some losers, so be sure to wash your hands when you get home, or pack some antibacterial lotion!
I laughed so hard when I read this! I am just like the other mom. I’m always suggesting playdates.
Once, I had known someone for all of 5 minutes, invited her to join the playgroup I was starting and now our families are so close that the kids have playdates all the time, sign up for summer camp together and we’ll babysit their kids overnight and vice versa. That was 6 years ago. I guess you do have to kiss a lot of frogs, and it can be a bit weird when your styles don’t mesh, but it can be worth the risk. I’ll keep my fingers crossed that she’s neither a Scientologist nor a Precious Memories collector.
http://www.bethsfavouritethings.blogspot.com
Ha Ha. Hopefully she doesn’t read your blog. You forgot that she might ask you to join in on a pyramid scheme.
Hey Jules,
I got light-headed after reading this post as this is a major anxiety of mine too. I will be thinking of you.
Good Luck!!
Are you my long-lost twin? LOL
I get the same way and usually avoid things like birthday parties and the like because it’s out of my comfort zone (and a huge part of my business is all about sales!). I like my small little circle o’ friends…but sometimes think it would be nice to be part of the “in” crowd too (then I realize, no I really don’t, LOL).
And, as someone else said, she might be the next best friend to come into your life. Hopefully she doesn’t have a collection of knives to show you! ;)
Are you my long-lost twin? LOL
I get the same way and usually avoid things like birthday parties and the like because it’s out of my comfort zone (and a huge part of my business is all about sales!). I like my small little circle o’ friends…but sometimes think it would be nice to be part of the “in” crowd too (then I realize, no I really don’t, LOL).
And, as someone else said, she might be the next best friend to come into your life. Hopefully she doesn’t have a collection of knives to show you! ;)
Are you my long-lost twin? LOL
I get the same way and usually avoid things like birthday parties and the like because it’s out of my comfort zone (and a huge part of my business is all about sales!). I like my small little circle o’ friends…but sometimes think it would be nice to be part of the “in” crowd too (then I realize, no I really don’t, LOL).
And, as someone else said, she might be the next best friend to come into your life. Hopefully she doesn’t have a collection of knives to show you! ;)
This is the makings of my worst nightmare. I’m a shut-in. I don’t do social things, especially with strangers. I hope it goes well and you and the boys make new friends. Tell me what it’s like out there in the world…..with people. Maybe take some treats for the cats. That would be a nice gesture.
Oy VEY. The minute my kids were old enough to go to other people’s houses without me was A DAY THAT I CELEBRATED. No crying for me that they were “old.” Nuh-uh. It was all about me not having to make the horrendous small talk.
Yeah. Totally nervous right about now…
Wow, I haven’t even enter that phase yet and now you’re making me nervous! Good luck tomorrow!
A “normal” Mom? Ha, I don’t think so. This has serial killer written all over it.
hilarious as usual! (from a mom who DOES do lunch AND book clubs) :-)
OMG, too funny. I am dreading a playdate today b/c I’m just not fond of the mom. Ugh.
i’m still waiting to get a close friend out of the mom thing. good luck. be sure to tell us how it goes!
So, how did it go???