Please stop.
Lately you’ve been hurting my eyes, and I think it’s time for an intervention. You’ve always been the bastion of safe shopping. It used to be an indecisive young lady, such as myself, could wander into your store and buy anything– confident that while it may not be exciting, revolutionary, or the hallmark of modern design, it would at least last several seasons without offending anyone’s design sensibilities. You took us suburban moms into your brushed-canvas rolled arms and said, “It’s OK, I’m a slip cover. You can wash me after I’m peed and puked on.” And so we bought you. And we were happy.
I admit to turning a blind eye when I saw this oceanic lovely lampooned on Decorno. Just a little design hiccup, I thought, clearly the product of a long, gray winter.
Pottery Barn, how could you? More importantly, what the??? A herd of elephants? On a pillow? Mind you, elephants are my favorite animal ever and I still find this egregious conduct on your part. Will you soon be accepting pictures of our pets so you can machine-weave them into throws for our sofas? Please advise. If so, I can have one made up of the kids for my 87 year old grandmother.
Let’s take it one step further and go over the copy, shall we?
Incorporating photography into furnishings brings a fresh look to a room. (False.) Printed with a highly realistic ink-jet technique (“Things Remembered.”), our photoreal pillow captures the image of an elephant herd in espresso tones (The color of dung.). Printed on smooth cotton canvas and backed with espresso textural linen. (This pillow is rougher than an elephant’s ass.)
Demonic Pottery Barn, I rebuke you! Go back to the fiery bowels of bad design from which you crawled and let the original, safe, Pottery Barn do it’s job. From this point forward I expect to see canvas slipcovers, the color red, hurricane candle shades, and a smattering of starfish in the summer and reindeer in the winter. No exceptions.
I trust we won’t need to have this discussion again.
Regards,
Jules
LOL
I am totally with you. I love hurricane candle shades! For the last few years I have shared your reactions but at clothing stores. I still shop in the junior section (yes, i admit it) and I am like what the **^% is Kohls (insert store here) thinking. Who would wear this stuff? um real juniors…
Wow. Uh, just wow.
And I don’t feel so bad for snarking on Pier 1 now! ;)
The oceanic dresser thingy and the elephant pillow are just too painful. Though there must be a resurgance of the African Safari look going on because I walked into Z Gallerie a few weeks ago to find it completely decorated for the movie “Out of Africa” complete with faux animal – EVERYTHING, even coasters. I think they even had the mosquito netting bed cover thingy also?
I wasn’t into it (animal print) on the first go around and still can’t buy in on it. Perhaps, when I’m 75 and living in the desert I’ll manage to buy a zebra rug…..Until then give me the classics, please.
That pillow looks like something you would find in an airport gift shop. I read making it lovely’s post on Pier 1 also and agree with both of you. What is happening to the world? I sure hope this isn’t a sign that I’m getting old and not cool. Oh wait, I was never cool, okay I hope this isn’t a sign that I’m getting old.
Standing and applauding