Churning

Last week happened. The Mister and I were both sick, both down with fevers, both muddling through the days with two healthy boys. It was a bit like being kicked in the teeth, but not anything worth complaining or whining about. We were both sick and had to make it work. We did. So have a million other parents, including you. We all go through it and we all survive. The end.

I’m doing better now, a little tired because Mikey came down with our bug and has a high fever. I worry. I don’t sleep. I check on him more than necessary and bring him his favorites: applesauce, movies, cold compresses for his forehead and lots of tissues.

On Sunday my dad called to compliment me on a salad I made over the weekend and to see how Mikey was feeling. He commented on the hard a beating we received from this year’s cold and flu season. I agreed, but I think it’s just our turn. It seems like every couple of years most people go through a “sicker than everyone else” spell. It’s been two years since we’ve really been sick together, so I suppose that means we were due.

After I got off the phone I went to the store to buy some medicine and cookies. It wasn’t as cold and rainy as the day before, but by the time I got home the sky hung black in the north and the wind took advantage of the forgiving trunks of the palm trees. It was both sinister and beautiful. I stayed outside to watch the clouds race across the sky until the bags from Target became uncomfortable to hold.

Happy, Happy

I’m going to make each week better than the last.

:: On Saturday I died from the cuteness of jerseys so big they hung to the knees and pants so loose they were hitched up to the sternum. I came back to life and screamed myself hoarse when Mikey and Nico both hit doubles.

:: You could have knocked me over with a feather on Sunday when the priest announced an opportunity to visit Rome and attend mass at St. Peter’s tomb. He petitioned to have the congregation positioned where we could shake The Pope’s hand. Seeing The Pope and shaking his hand are both on my life list, but I never imagined either would fall within the realm of possibility. Given the price of tickets to Rome, it’s a long shot. Still. Can you imagine?! I may shake the hand of The Pope before I make yogurt. (Also on my life list.)

:: Monday was a good food day. I ate healthy foods and had dinner ready ahead of time.

:: I charmed my way out of a ticket on Tuesday. I was using my phone without a headset. According to the officer, I was yapping away while he stared at me in disbelief. When he asked me where I was going, I told him “The ironies keep piling up–I’m on my way to church!” He laughed and said when I got there, I should say a few Our Fathers.

:: On Wednesday I cleaned the house top to bottom and swept away my bad mood in the process.

:: I wore makeup on Thursday to compliment my new jeans and fancy sweatshirt. I received several compliments and felt pretty.

:: Today is Friday! I’m going to make veggie tacos for dinner and instead of tortillas use crepes. I have a crepe maker I bought it in college when I was 19 years old. It makes the crepe making process fool proof!

Have a happy, happy weekend!

Happy, Happy

I started the week determined to make it great. I’m ending it committed to making the next one even better. These are some of the things that made me happy.

:: On Monday my husband took a vacation day (unheard of!) to recover from a week out of town on business and allow me to kick to the curb the last of the flu from last week. We went to breakfast. It was nice.

:: I didn’t have to cook dinner on Tuesday. We ate leftovers, which everyone enjoyed.

:: The Rules of Civility discussion on Wednesday went well. I was nervous and didn’t know what to say. I picked up steam once the comments rolled in and had fun talking about books.

:: On Thursday I went to Mikey’s baseball practice in place of my husband, who was stuck in a meeting. He arrived near the middle, but I stayed a little longer to watch Mikey play. He might earn an infield position this year. Third base!

:: I spent pockets of the day daydreaming about a family vacation I am trying to plan for the summer. I would love to visit Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, and Virginia over two weeks. Or, if we can’t swing that, maybe a few days at the Smithsonian or some other super cool, not to be missed, dinosaur museum.

:: I had a great dentist appointment.

:: I bought rose colored sunglasses! I put them on and expected second glances on the street and from the parents at school and baseball practice, but I didn’t even get one. I suppose people expect a girl wearing a rose patterned cardigan to wear rose colored glasses. Oh, the irony. Their ridiculousness makes me happy. They were on clearance at Target, which makes me happiest.

:: I predict the lunch date I have planned with the boys (sandwich shop/bakery, bookstore) will go off without a hitch. I’m going to buy The Book Thief. Also, it’s Friday!

 

What the Doctor Said

My appointment on Tuesday with the new doctor went well. The results of this latest course of blood work is similar to what I had over the summer. I am in excellent health, including my lipid panel, which is I am happy about given I am over weight. Thin doesn’t equate health, of course, but being overweight does come with risk factors and health concerns. My blood work belies all that, with two exceptions.

My vitamin D levels remain positively dreadful. Truly awful.

My blood work suggests inflammation somewhere in the body, with a possible elevated cardiac risk factor. Given that everything else is normal, this most likely relates to my vitamin D levels, which were discouragingly low, if I haven’t already mentioned.

This new physician is an M.D. who believes in alternative treatments, so I left with a list of herbs and supplements to buy at the health food store. We’ll see how I feel in a month.

Vitamin D was not on that list. Instead, we are going to try applying it topically through a cream dispensed by a compound pharmacy. I don’t have it yet–it should be ready by next week–but I’m hopeful this will be what brings my levels into an acceptable range.

Enough about me. I feel like I am whining.

We spoke of Mikey, of course. I gave him a brief history and he suggested, without seeing him, the removal of dairy and wheat from his diet. I scheduled an appointment for him in March so he can do a proper work up on him, but for now I begin the task of modifying our diets. I’m not afraid of the challenge. When Nicholas was deathly allergic to nuts, his allergist told me the greatest chance he had for outgrowing his allergy would be complete avoidance of any and all nuts, including tree nuts. We were also instructed to avoid any item made in a facility that handles nuts. That eliminated most foods sold in health food stores and Trader Joe’s.

I made almost everything from scratch and we rarely ate out. It was a challenge at first, but I got used to it and established a good routine. In retrospect, it was the healthiest the boys have ever been. Still sick frequently, but not as much.

I found a few books on Amazon that touched upon childhood asthma, allergies, and healthy homes. Before I bought them, I thought I would try to corral some of the books I already have on the subject to avoid duplication. This is but a smattering; there are a few I know I have but can’t find. I was embarrassed, and closed the page on Amazon.

After my appointment on Tuesday, I felt more tired than usual and didn’t feel like doing much of anything. I attributed this to the stress of getting my blood results and the stress of talking about Mikey and admitting that something is not entirely right. I spent the last two days doing more research, of course (those of you who follow me on Twitter know I’ve been tweeting studies I’ve found), but I also spent a good deal of time vegging out reading books and blogs. Kelly always shares the best links, and her Monday post was no different. I found myself on Rachel Saldana’s blog reading about positivity.

Positivity is an attitude I often lack when it comes to myself. For others, I can be a damn fine cheerleader. Top-notch, in fact. But when it comes to me I resemble Eeyore. I’m never good enough, smart enough, and definitely not thin enough. My mom bought me that Norman Vincent Peale book at the top of the right stack when I was a newlywed. Come to think of it, she’s bought me plenty of books simplifying, slowing down, and positive attitude. When I was in college, my brother bought me this book for Christmas. I thought he was joking. He was not. I should see if I still have it. (I never read it.)

So there I was, reading Buttons Magee, thinking maybe Mikey could get better, or improve faster, if I change my attitude. Many people I admire credit positive thinking for much of their success. Even Oprah, for goodness sakes, thinks it’s the bee’s knees. At Camp Mighty, one of Oprah’s producers shared  her philosophy on positive thinking and creating intentions. I remember feeling inspired, convinced I would start being more positive from that point forward. Then I started worrying about looking stoned because my new mascara made my eyes burn. So much for that.

Every few years I think, “This is the year!” I’m going to believe in myself and get positive. I buy a bunch of books on the subject, most of which go unread. Every book on positivity you see in that pile is unread. I have a few more, like the Eckhart Tolle book I have listed in my Unread Library, but I can’t find it. Probably because when I tried reading it (several times) I just couldn’t get past the woo-woo.

The three books on the bottom right I bought on March 18, 2009. I know this because I found the receipt tucked inside the top one.I read the first few chapters of the book second from the bottom, realized the premise was that a ghost/spirit/other worldly being named Abraham was speaking through a woman and quietly closed the book. The others I haven’t even opened. They were all highly recommended by someone but, I don’t know.

Do you believe in positive thinking, intentions, and that what you think multiplies? If so, how has it helped you? I’m not unreceptive to the concept, as my library can attest. I’m want to believe, but I don’t know. I suppose it’s the age-old battle between the left and right sides of my brain. My analytical side wants double-blind studies with p-values > 0.01. My expressive side wants a new gauzy caftan to wear to the next smudging ceremony.

Both sides want to be sold, or at least more convinced than not.

p.s. Happy birthday to my Mister. Your present this year is my better attitude, and I promise not to worry as much about little things. This is the year! That sounds vaguely familiar.

Collecting

This week I am going to collect moments. I’m going to try to relax after a stressful six months (some of which was of my own doing) in preparation for the busy holiday season coming up. I’m going to stay away from the computer, so I apologize in advance if I don’t respond to emails or comments as quickly as I usually do. I’m going to live more than observe for a change.

We’ll see how that goes.

Thank you for being so wonderful and supportive, especially these last few months. It has not gone unnoticed.

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