Dogs Archive


Puppers

I received an email the other day from Sharon Montrose, who is a ridiculously talented photographer from LA married to a ridiculously talented lover of human powered transportation.  They both honored Tristan and I by generously contributing their talent to The Bright Side Project, so I wasn’t surprised to open my email and see this pretty face.

This charming girl is in need of a good home.  Here is all her pertinent information from Sharon.  If you or someone you know are interested, please let me know!

Friends,

We found this little gem of a mutt loose in traffic on Venice Blvd.

She’s about a year old and weighs just over 30lbs. Our guess is Basset Hound/Shepherd. Does that make her a Shep-Hound or a Bass-Herd? You make the call.

We’ve been crate training her - She’s happy to quietly hangout in “her den” for more than a couple hours at a time, and for a full 8 hours at night.

She’s good on a leash, has a so-so sit, is very calm, and loves other dogs.

She’s had a rabies/distemper vaccine, a hearty bath, and a dose of Advantage.

She’s not spayed, but we could take care of that once she finds her new people (or they find her!).

Any takers?

** Please forward to anyone and everyone - We need to find this gal a good home!

Thanks!
Sharon

Misery Loves Company

Buster

Last night, Buster, our Beagle #2, couldn’t walk without help. This morning he was worse, so I had the Mister put him in the car and off I went to the vet’s office in the pouring rain. The tech weighed him, the vet probed him and we all winced for Buster when he yiped and cried as as the vet felt along his neck and spine. My poor furry baby.

Diagnosis: Fatty-Fatty-Two-by-Four.

It seems Mr. Buster has gained 7 pounds in the last year. How could he not? He’s become a scrounger. I can’t leave food on the table for one minute without him trying to knock to the floor the leftovers. Coupled with our sporadic walking schedule since the arrival of Nicholas, Buster now weighs a whopping 38 pounds. All that weight hasn’t exactly made him more nimble and at some point last night, while we were out, an attempt to quickly jump over a candle stick must have went suddenly awry. Kind of like that one time I was feeling saucy and put on a bra.

Buster got a shot and some muscle relaxers to keep him comfortable while his back heals. I told him once he is feeling better he is going with me to Weight Watchers. Friday mornings, no excuses! I estimate he can eat 10-15 points a day. He can boost up the point count by doing exercise videos with me. I’ll even buy him miniature terry cloth wrist warmers to keep his muscles loose and fashionable.

Buster

But before all that, he must rest. Doctor’s orders.

The Parting Gift

Everyone has a nervous tic; hers was to end every sentence with an annoying hmmmmmmm.

“Let me get this straight. You’re telling me you’ve had a Kennel Cough problem the last few weeks and you think Buddy has it and now you need us to pick him up right now?”

“Yes, that is correct. hmmmmmmmm. But we can’t guarantee he got it here. hmmmmmmm. It’s highly contagious. hmmm. He could have gotten it anywhere. hmmmmmmm.”

“He’s been in your facility since Tuesday. Today’s Sunday. When did he start coughing?”

“He coughed three times last night. hmmmmmm. Yes. Well. OK. I think he got the Kennel Cough here. hmmmmmm.”

“So if you have a problem with Kennel Cough, why didn’t you tell us when we booked the appointment. Obviously we were going on vacation!”

“Yes. Well. Ok. hmmmmmm. We did have signs posted. hmmmm.”

“Signs don’t do a person much good WHEN YOU’RE DROPPING OFF YOUR DOGS TEN MINUTES BEFORE YOU LEAVE ON VACATION! I think you should have let us know about your issue with COMMUNICABLE DISEASES when we called to make the appointment. Especially if you don’t have a vet on site and expect SOMEONE ON VACATION to pick up the dog WITHIN THE HOUR.”

“hmmmm. You’ll be here soon to take Buddy to the ER for and examination and treatment? Buster is fine!”

“Really? Buster is fine? Well thank heavens for frickin’ miracles. No, I won’t be there soon. My brother-in-law will be there soon to drive 30 more minutes to take Buddy to the ER. But my inlaws have a dog of their own, and can’t take care of Buddy afterwards so we will have to cut our vacation short.”

“hmmmmmm. I appreciate your dilemma.”

“I…You…Uh…GAH! OK, look, I really would like to rip you a new one and make all sorts of commotion and demand an adjustment to my bill but I know you are not in a position to make decisions. So, I’m going to ask that you please discuss my situation with the owner and see if she can reduce Buddy’s boarding by the amount we will have to pay in emergency room fees and medications.”

“Thank you for understanding I don’t have much control here. hmmmmm. I will speak to the owner on your behalf.”

I hung up the phone and had 15 pretend fights in my head with the owner, all of which ended with me get free boarding for life.

We tried to enjoy our last day, but all we could think of was poor Buddy. The temperature was supposed to reach over 100, and we were nervous about shade and water. Our neighbors assured us they would check on him often and would turn a deaf ear to the barking our indoor dog would undoubtedly resort to when he found himself still outside at bedtime.

We were also sad, imagining poor Buddy coughing up lungs and gasping for dying breaths–until my brother-in-law called to say the vet could find nothing wrong with Buddy. No Kennel Cough. In fact, no cough at all. Buddy was most likely clearing his throat and the morons at the boarding facility panicked and instituted a Kennel Cough Red Alert at our expense. Mind you, this is a ridiculously expensive boarding facility. It’s one of those crazy doggie hotels with private rooms, gymnasiums, spa treatments, and, basically, more luxurious accommodations than we would be enjoying on our vacation. (We procrastinated and our vet was unable to accommodate our dogs. The Petrie Dish was the only facility available for the holiday weekend. Gee! I wonder why?)

The next day, after an 8 hour drive, I arrived at The Petrie Dish to pick up Buster and was angry to find him in a small crate in what appeared to be a makeshift quarantine room. I was also surprised to discover the nervous tic my phone-friend had was the least of her problems. I made an effort to ignore teeth that could eat corn on the cob through a picket fence and tried to figure out on which of her crossed eyes to focus. Stick with the right. The left has a white spot. Doesn’t that mean retinal damage? You see? You shouldn’t have thought mean things about her nervous…

“Are you here for Buster?”

“Yes, but why isn’t he in his room?” I couldn’t figure out what eye to look at. Buster heard my voice and immediately starting barking like mad.

“Well, he was in contact with Buddy. We are taking necessary precautions. hmmmm”

“It turns out Buddy has nothing wrong with him, you know. But whatever. I would just like to pick up Buster and head home, please.” I waited, credit card poised, to receive my offer for free boarding for life.

“Right. Well, I spoke with the owner and she said NO.”

“What do you mean, ’she said NO?’”

“I mean you need to pay Buddy’s full boarding fee.”

At this point I opened my mouth and words flew out like daggers. In fact, by the time I was done she was spread eagle on the wall and looked very much like a knife thrower’s assistant, but instead of knives she was outlined with verbs, adjectives, and exclamation points. I asked her to put the owner on the phone, and she refused.

“We posted signs about the Kennel Cough. Leaving your dogs here was the risk you chose to take.”

“NO. Leaving our dogs here was the risk you forced us to take. There’s a difference.” That last zinger made her eyes straighten, but only for a second.

In the end, we were at a stalemate. She refused to discount Buddy’s ER visit and medications from his balance. I told her that she would take the reduced fee or nothing. She agreed to take nothing. I decided she had three braincells, and they were fighting.

So I left. I paid Buster’s balance and told the bucky-beaver-cyclops that I was very eager to speak with the owner and clear up the balance without things escalating. I reiterated my position and asked her to have the owner call me as soon as possible.

I have yet to hear from the owner. She may have decided to forgo the balance. When you factor in the ER fees there was only $40 left on the account. Then again, she may just send me to collections. If she does I will pay it. Then I will turn around and sue her in small claims court for Buddy’s medical fees and costs. Maybe I’ll get to use my law degree, after all. Because that’s why I went to law school and have all those loans: to go to small claims court.

Favorite Moment

What’s the deal with crafters and cats? There sure is a whole lotta feline lovin’ going on in the craft community. I will never forget my first email exchange with someone very well known in the craft community. The email was peppered with things like

^_^ and

^_~ and

>_< and

^–^

At first I didn’t know what was going on. Was this some sort of craft code I wasn’t privy to? Typographical errors? Nope. This, my friends, is cat speak. Whereby you, an internet business owner, turn into a feline and communicate accordingly. It took me reading tens of different emails and 50+ posts on various craft forums to crack the code. In other words, 7 minutes.

As best as I can tell, here are what these heiroglyphics are supposed to mean (although those of you with cats are welcome to chime in and tell me differently).

^_^ Happy Cat. This is similar to :) or :-) but with ears and whiskers (or is that a pair of closed eyes?). This person just handed down an awesome tip, had a tutorial published, or just received the warm and fuzzies from an unexpected compliment.

ex. If you have short runs and want to avoid offset printing costs, look for a printer with an HP Indigo digital press. ^_^

^_~ Frisky Cat. This is similar to ;) or ;-). I can’t decide if that’s a winking eye or an ear flicking on the right. Regardless, I think the overall spirit of the emoticon is reserved for teasing, pointing out the obvious, and humorous sarcasm.

ex. I could give you my HP Indigo printing source, but I’d have to kill you. ^_~

>_< Angry Cat. You’re treading on thin kitty litter. This is similar to >:( or >:-( and I think the idea is a hissing, pissed off cat with their ears splayed or pulled down tight. You know how cats do that thing where they put their ears back? Right before they spit and bite the crap out of you with those razor sharp teeth? Yeah, that. That’s what this is.

ex. One time time a web designer (who shall remain nameless) copied my entire site design and tried to sell it on ebay as a template. She claimed it was a coincidence, even though it had my code. >_<

^–^ Sleepy Cat. I guess this is similar to something like -.- or *o* and I think this person, or kitty, is asleep from exhaustion or boredom.

ex. Where is her favorite moment? Is there a point to this post? ^–^

My point is that the craft community love cats and I love dogs. I’m still trying to come up with dog speak, but haven’t been successful. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t dislike cats, I just love dogs. I especially love my dogs, Buddy and Buster. My original Favorite Moment post for today centered around my beloved beagles and the overwhelming feeling of love and loyalty they exude on a daily basis. In fact, this picture inspired the post.

Buddy & Buster

The little guys were exhausted after an unsuccessful photo-shoot with Mikey in front of the fire. As a reward, I let them snuggle in my chair for a winter’s nap in front of the fire. I couldn’t resist taking a picture of the cuteness. Two hours later I was still typing away on the superiority of dogs when The Mister came home. Buster had long since jumped off the chair and went to sleep in our bedroom. The Mister wasn’t in the bedroom 10 minutes before he came out asking Mikey if he fed Buster something. I stopped in mid-type and mentioned that some yogurt had gone missing during snack time.

The Mister: “Well, something is wrong with Buster.”
Jules: “Is he OK?”
The Mister: “No. Not at all. I could only get him to respond to me by mentioning cookies.”
Jules: “What are you talking about?” Denial, denial, denial.

OK, I think, he has an upset tummy. No big deal. I called Buster to me. He stumbled over, eyes closed. I called his name again. He turned his head towards my voice, eyes closed. He tried to lay down, but I kept calling his name so, ever the good boy, he tried to stand at attention. He couldn’t open his eyes, so he just hung his head waiting for me to tell him what to do.

The Mister and I looked at each other and I told him to get Buster to the hospital; he was already grabbing his keys. Mikey ate dinner while I sat at the table and fretted, waiting for The Mister to call.

The Mister finally called, and the tests came back fairly clear. The x-rays showed some gas, but what most likely happened is Buster inhaled some soot, ash, and creosote during our ill fated fire place photo-shoot. He received an eye rinse at the hospital and came home with some steroids and eye lotion. Poor baby. He’s still not 100%, but he is home safe, sound, and soon to be snuggled in my lap once I’m done with this post.

So, my favorite moment this week was the call from The Mister that Buster was battered but not beaten. That, and the pitter-patter of my Buster’s feet climbing up the steps home and heading straight into the kitchen for some roasted turkey and vegetables. He couldn’t really open his eyes enough to see, but he could still smell. ^_^

Oh, Buster!
My Buster, begging for turkey he can’t see and still wearing his hospital tag.

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